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Travel & Tourism , Politics
United States
Ends: Feb 09, 2025
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GULF OF AMERICA DAY
SERIOUSLY?
The Gulf of Mexico has been the “Gulf of Mexico” since the 1550s. However, as it is an official Presidential Proclamation bordering on absurdity, we must cover it.A Presidential Ode to the "Gulf of America"
Behold! The ninth of February, twenty-twenty-five,
A day so monumental, the pelicans high-five.
No matter if since 1550 it was “Gulf of Mexico” called,
With one grand scratch of my pen, all that is forestalled!
I signed that faithful order, fueling national pride,
Turning centuries of history on its satirical side.
“Restore American greatness!” – my rallying cry,
We’ll just rename this ocean nook—who needs to ask why?
From proud Texas waves to Florida’s sandy spa,
This is now the Gulf of America—exclámalo, “Hurrah!”
Pay no heed to fish or charts older than our states,
They’ll catch up soon enough, thanks to these new dictates.
Today I fly on Air Force One to see this gem,
A testament to power—just ask my black Sharpie pen.
Let us celebrate ahistorically with pomp and parades,
And pretend the last 475 years were but passing charades.
So rejoice, America—rewrite that watery tale!
Wave banners, start ceremonies, let the party horns wail.
As I proclaim Gulf of America Day with zeal,
The world sighs, awaiting accountability over this blasted beal.”
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